...the name is christela
and i study at de la salle lipa...and saint bridget college when i was in elementary...
...i love to write nonesense that makes sense, singing, dancing, and meeting with my therapist -my guitar
haha i can't believe i'm sixteen! And to think tomorrow I'm going to be a senior... gosh, I don't even think I'm ready! Especially for college... I haven't really had it all planned out yet! rawr
Well, my birthday is usually a holiday since it is on the 12th of June and it is the Independence Day of my motherland. But it was moved yesterday soo.... we celebrated yesterday. My brother has to go to work today and my cousin had classes so no choice... but it is good though... really!
The event was really small and simple and I like it that way. My brother's girlfriend came over, my sister's boyfriend came over, my boyfriend came over...haha! joke [was just kidding to the last one!]
looking back...well I had a very interesting year [lagi naman] and another year came and....anyways GOd knows =p
yeah yeah yeah blog aboooot yesterday!!! date: May 24, 2006 [a thursday]
yesterday was thursday... the last day for my advance classes in physics and probably the last day for me to hang out since it is only weeks before the upcoming school year...
well after classes... RAWR had a meeting to have our 'work' done...
we must memorize all the new songs the band wrote...well that didn't happen but the songs turned out to be very cool i admit.
i'm envious to the Snow Goddess since she can come up with a song and its chords right away... i used to be like that...but it is alright...i believe i only write songs that breaks my heart..haha and that doesnt apply anymore... i feel soo much better now
then i realized i'm not updating the story that Abiona and I were working on... and i'm not writing any songs for such a long time... maybe because i spend most of my time daydreaming and not applying to paper ..hahah
as we went jamming around at Abiona's place, we decided to 'jam' more at the mall... LITERALLY!
haha...we out our guitars the the second floor in Robinsons and played the song 'Stuck' first... hahaha...we're getting the attention of people passing by hahah
after our goody-good time i need to go back home...
and.... i was making the best of the day as i can since it will be such a long time..
...like the title of our album [RAWR] : Before all good things end....
Canace looks even more beautiful than before. Blayde just looked at her. He wanted to embrace her but... it will only happen in his dreams.
[she's not Canace anymore... that's Luana... she'll never come back]
Blayde...
Hm?
I'm glad that this is over
Everyone is... except for the fact a lot died
No... not that battle...
What?
Nevermind..
...
I'm sorry
Sorry for what?
Canace pressed herself against Blayde's body, giving him a tight embrace. Blayde couldn't believe what she's doing... He couldn't resist her warmth as he wrapped his arms around her... Just to let her feel that he needs her... eventhough she forgot everything about their past... about them
I'm not going anywhere... i promise
Luana?
No, Blayde...it's me
You?
Blayde looked deeply in her loving eyes. He recognized that look in her. The look that he's been longing to see after he saw Canace again as Luana.
i woke up just in time to fix myself and go to my advance classes w/c will start at 8am...unfortunately when i decided to SMS my teacher to double check the time and she said that it will start at 1pm! dangg...i was already on the bus when i sent her that message!...i mean...what am i going to do???? hahah
when i arrived at our place by 8:10, she apologized and there was a mix up in the schedule that's why things turned out to be sooo wrong...lolz...two of my classmates went home already well anyways they live just few miles away...but me? i cant go home yet! taga batangas city kaya ako tas lipa pa ang pinupuntahan ko!! sayang pamasahe!
it was sooo darn hot so i decided to stay at Starmart...katabi lang naman at saka malamig pa dun....as i was doing nothing and stared at cars passing by, i got so bored that i even drew a cartoon character at the back of my Math Notebook....i got even more bored when i checked my watch and it was only 8:50....i sat there for like an hour and decided to go out and look for a computer cafe to blog and unfortunately i found one and it is still closed...
...i went back...sat down again....stared at cars again....until my butt became wet for sitting for hours ...then dear Abiona texted me about boredom while i was texting with Blayde...
...then i fell asleep for maybe 5-10 mins then i saw my former service mate and he sat down with me for a little chit-chat...not surprized when i saw him with a pack of cigaretts...i kinda knew from the very beginning that he was really into those stuff..oh well...
not knowing Blayde saw me and my former service mate as they pass by Starmart! he saw me and i didn't! dangg...that's not fair! anyways...
i was a little hungry...so i went to the "hotdogan" to eat hotdog!! yay!
i waited till 1:00pm till the class start...then things went fine well...a little Trigonometry and a dose of turon made it a little ok ....
...........after classes i waited for the bus for like an 30 mins! or maybe an hour...darnn! i couldnt wait so i decided to take a van...luckily i found one yahoooooooo......Abiona told me not to sleep so i didnt so all through the trip i was sleeping with my eyes open..
new blog look...a fresh start for a refreshed feel and fresh to da fresh to da sakkatum fresh! (O_ohuh?)
lolz...anyways a lot of things happend for the few past months since i haven't updated this blog. it's actually toooooooo long to share it in one post and i'm to lazy to put it all! =p
so... this post is not going to be any longer...it's kind of an introduction to my "new" blog...
i deleted a lot of posts and still i saved some of them...
Canace: i hate it... i hate you and everything about you! Luana: it just so happens that it happend in the wrong time Canace: so you're telling me it's just a coincidence? Luana: . . . Canace: everything happens for a reason. Luana: i'm just telling you that it just-- Canace: oh just shut up Luana: God made this happen so be cool ok? Canace: pssh... how can i be okay when i'm in the middle of my tantrums? Luana: relax...i'm trying to be patient here... Canace: it's better to let it all out even for just a second Luana: i understand... i know that... Canace: i'm tired... Luana: me too... i'm as tired a you are Canace: of course! i am you and you are me Luana: *smirks* are you done crying? Canace: are you? Luana: uh-huh Canace: you okay now? Luana: yes... and you Canace: i feel so much better now.
me and the other side of me.... our conversation...
earlier on i was working on our music to be used for mass dance. and then i was in the middle of mixing the music my brother just came in and he told me not to waste my time. but i told him what i was doing is something important and he said that i should be surprised in how long i'll be doing this(the mixing). as he walked out the door i whispered to myself that this thing is not as easy as it looks and it does take such a long time to finish! like, i'm grounded for using the pc in weekdays so i have no time! and by tuesday we're going to start practicing for mass dance and we have to be ready within 3 friggin weeks. and there's this research that i have to finish and to be send to my classmate in the morning so he could edit it. then all of the sudden i lost it. wala na ako s mood! i wanted to continue mixing but i can't. then i turned off the pc and rush to the patio and threw my tantrums. i cried... i even blurted out these words:
Lord, i'm not mad at You but why does it supposed to happen in such bad timing?
i hate it! i hate myself...i was in the mood then all of the sudden... bang!
ugh... i'm tired...i don't want this anymore... i dont hate You, Lord, i don't hate my brother..
i hate myself for being so emotional
my brother does not understand...
but i know his concerned about me... and the electricity >_<
but i will waste this very moment to cry...
i did said that. so stupid... i'm so stupid. all i want to happen is this pain to be gone...
next weekend i'll be gone for a while. i'll be in school and i'll be participating in th Search-In. i'm so excited because this will be happening once in a lifetime *i think...but why miss the chance?*
i just really don't know what to put in this friggin post...oh well...imma make this not so pointless...
hmm... oh yeah....here it is...
my parents are leaving and they'll be in NY with my sister from October till January. i was like...omigosh! this Christmas will be my first Christmas without my mom and dad! there will be no daddy's special spaghetti, no daddy's special baked macaroni, no daddy's special roast chicken... T_T
back in BULIK... uhmm... what were we doing? some teacher is teaching us how to use Adobe Photoshop. well... yeah i know some and yet there are few thing that i don't really know about [pssh...i bet Rexie knows a lot about this] lol
aint that good enough...lmao!
ok where was i? hmmm... if i have lost of free time, imma put pictures in this blog... [yes i know that i'm a camwh*re but hey, i will not put not only my pictures...DUH!!]
i was surfing the net with my classmate Dorawatching cute kitties at Youtubethen i passed by a video of my most fave, Avril Lavigne-Whibley :) . She looks stunning right now and still the edgy rocker chick inside of her is still there. this video is definitely very moving [for me] because i know our dear Av IS a hopless romantic and finally ended her story to a real happy ending. but...actually, it's just a start for her and her husband, Deryk. i wish all of them all the luck. God bless them :D
finally... exams are over... but it doesn't stop there... i am actually friggin nervous about my grades....honestly. well i'm happy, it's the second quarter! wooot! hahaha... this gotta be better than the first quarter... IT BETTER BE! grr...rawr. and again...*you guys already know this*... my head hurts.... hahahah and again... it hurts... gotta sleep? dont think so!!! R A W R hahahha whatever...i feel... soo....drained... be back blogging! ciao!
haha..kinda funny... i'm actually blogging here in school... well nothing to do... it's not allowed to surf at friendster here.... evenYM is not allowed. actually my head hurts [again].... what time did i sleep? uhmm...probably 12:05? i always stay up late and i dont even think that i will ever sleep early... my head aches [i already said that right? urrrgghh] *_* can't wait until 2nd quarter....hmmm.... i'm actually talkiung nonesense here....bah!! *rolls eyes* and my head aches.... >_<
i know highschool is really highschool. and when there's highschool, there's highschool drama. [a friend of mine corrected me and she said, hellschool]
have you guys watched the movies jawbreaker, mean girls, and cinderella story? i enjoyed watching 'em but the thing is at the end of the movie i just found myself saying "I HATE HIGHSCHOOL DRAMA" w/c is true.
the thing is this:
we all have different minds and point of views. we have our own versions of what's hot and not. there are what we call "popular groups" in highschool w/c others think that they are the "cool ones", the "trend setters", the "ones to look up to" [thinkPlastics of the Mean Girls] and because of their thoughts and opinions, it also becomes everybody's opinion and their what i so-called "followers" are offcially clones and real people are the one who are not cool to them. GET A LIFE!
another thing:
most esp. to girls... they look at a hill as a big friggin mountain!! like, every little thing that other people [ones who are not like them] do, they make a big thing out of it and then what happens? COLD WAR. been there, done that.... and i dont want it anymore. not because some people dont think or act like them then they have to do something about it just to be one of them of to get rid to those who are not "in".
"they just dont get it" i got this line by a friend of mine to whom i call 'Abiona'. because she was doing something that she could help for the class [reading the tarot] but there are these certain girls who were talking about Abiona and saying that what she's doing is pure evil/demonic.
i just saw Abiona fixing her things looking pissed off then she said the line- they just dont get it.
they just cant accept the fact that we are all different...SO LIVE WITH IT! they just cant accept the fact that there are times we oppose to what they like...LIVE WITH IT
*i just wanted to share what i thinkand feel deep inside of me when i get really pissed off about highschool drama...*
really...i only have 2-3 hrs of sleep every weekdays. then i'll have a 45 min sleep in the service when going to school and going home and an hour of sleep when i came home....and look, i have this nick of falling asleep in class. i can't focus my eyes, eyelids getting heavier, heavy head...and yes...head ache...
stupid huh? i may be the laziest person alive but i can still control myself [*raises eyebrow* yeah right!] i just need motivation...
actaully, i found this video from my friend's friendster page. this song made me think actually. it speaks the men's side about a complicated relationship...honestly i found myself addicted to this video....hahaha...thanks kuya chris! :D
THIS BLOG ENTRY CONTAINS GRAPHIC DETAILS! THINK TWICE BEFORE READING!
After first day, poof! I'm here back at home. I'll be absent for 2 days! Why? Because of my huge mistake about this infected open wound near my left ankle. I knew something is really wring about my open wound and pus are coming are always coming out of this friggin wound. Actuall,y it l;ooks like a boil gone wrong!!
Yesterday after classes, before going to the school van, I went to the clinic to check on my wound and ask what anitbiotics should be used and what i should to with it? I told her this was infected for 3 or 4 days and when i showed her my pretty skin hiding under the bandage , she was shocked! She said that thing is big and i should see a doctor immediately. She cleansed my wound and replaced my bandage to a new one. I was walking crippled to the school van and then i told mom that i havta go and see a doctor. So we went. Then my mom was stunned when the doctor said that my ankle should be x-rayed and be cleansed ASAP. And maybe it would be stitched! I was like, “go for it!!” well, it's for the better and para matapos na!!! at the operation, they injected anti-tetano (tama ba?) then started to put spread liquid thingys to my wound then injected anesthesia to lessen the pain. When doing the operation, i was laughing! It tickles! I was watching what they're doing to me until the doctor told the nurse to give me a pillow to hug on. So i took the pillow and i couldn't see what's happening but i can feel it. I was like squeezing my eyes because of the stingy pain and at the same time i was laughing! Weird!!
enough about the graphic scenes. Well again, here i am stuck at home AGAIN [parang bakasyon] doing what i used to do last summer... well that does it...ciao!!
It is official. I'm another year older and I'm saying goodbye to fourteen and say hello to fifteen. My morning started just right...my sister was the first one to greet me and then our helpers at home sang a happy birthday song, ate cereal for breakfast with my sister and my cousin, received a Happy Birthday kiss from my Dad, I lied down on my mom's bed to give her a morning kiss, a devotional book from kuya and an organizer from his girlfriend, a offline IM from my sister and a birthday wish from my bestfriend....nothing could be better. I'm overwhelmed about it.
The date is perfect, June 12, then the day after that (which is tomorrow) is the first day of school. It is perfect for a new start. I'll start everything from scratch. Forget all my worries and look forward for tomorrow.
Thank God I'm a year older now! All I wanna do now is to pray and read the book my brother gave me. There are so many things I want to thank. Actually I'm getting emotional now (y'know guys, I'm softy at times) and mixed emotions are coming in and out of my head! Well to ask you a question, have you ever thank people who mean so much to you at your birthday? And have you ever raised your hands to the skies and thank the Lord that he gave you another year to live?
I was reflecting about what I was when I was fourteen. Many challenges came up to me and the real world is slowly showing up to me and making my eyes and heart open to what is really happening. I have sacrificed a lot of things even the thing that I really loved, I have learned to move on despite all of the darkness that was blocking my light, I have learned to love again, and I have learned my lessons in all of my mistakes. A lot has happened to me when I was fourteen.
And now I'm fifteen, like I said, I'll start everything from scratch, refresh myself to have a good start in my brand new life.
Here's my comment about the Da Vinci Code. Whether believe or not to believe about the secret, it doesn't change my faith about God. Why be affected if Jesus Christ made it with Mary Magdalene and had a child? I don't really think it is a bad thing... maybe because it will disgrace Jesus' purity? I said to myself, so what? he IS God and was it a disgrace to His Father? And Jesus is part human and he also can experience affection to the opposite sex! Jesus did a lot for humanity and about Him having a baby is not a mud of your white clothing to Him. Mary Magdalene was saved by Jesus and it doesn't matter if Jesus fell in love. Jesus teaches love, so why be against it? Some people will say that Jesus will never do that, but I say 'why not?' He can do anything He wants and He will do nothing to disgrace us and to His Father. I've always looked up to Jesus and what He did for humanity means a lot big time.
The thing that I am bothered about is, why keep it a secret? I am a Christian and I would be proud that Jesus had a daughter. But if we put it this way, if the secret was not a secret before, things could've been worse or better at the present. But, who knows? I think it was sooooooo barbaric that in the old times men put women in the stake because one of them may be the bloodline of Jesus and made an excuse taht they're witches! You know what I think? This secret maybe started the discrimination of women. And I think this secret made this policy about there souldn't be a Catholic priestess...just priests and the women are just nuns.
For me, this didn't really affected my faith to God! Jesus can have a family, I respect Him, after all He's God! Actually, the Da Vinci Code made my faith stronger. Why? Because I can defend God about this. I may be at the middle between "Believe the code and weaken your faith" and "Dont believe the code because this is just to destroy Christianity" but the bottom line is: No other story, true or not, will weaken my faith in God"
I'm just sharing what I think and what I believe. I love talking about this things because this made me defend about God and what I think.
